I don’t know about you but one thing that’s really getting me down this New Year is the avalanche of “self improvement” advice that’s being thrust upon on us from every possible source. You only have to pick up a magazine to have “how to feel happier in 60 seconds, how to have perfect skin, 6 emotional workouts” screaming at you from the front cover. Log onto the Internet and we are bombarded with advice on; getting rid of bingo wings in 5 easy steps, ways to keep  New Year’s resolutions and in the words of Peter Kay; how to lose 10 stone in a daay! Even the newspapers are grabbing their share of the perfectionist cake by showing us how to make zero calorie recipes and reminding us of the evils of red wine (woe betide it if you like gin and tonic!)

Transforming ourselves from mere mortals to super humans in 10 easy steps is now the expected norm.

How are we supposed to keep up with this exhausting pantomime? And what’s it all about? Why this drive towards a perfectionist society? Do we really need it? Are we all so woefully inadequate that we need this step by step positive thinking instruction? Soon we won’t be able to walk out of our front doors without following a 3 step plan.

And the worst thing is THE GUILT – yes the guilt. I’m struggling to get out of bed in a morning as it is but all this stuff is making me hide under the duvet even more, not wanting to peek out in case I get struck down by a giant thunderbolt cos I ate the whole top section from the box of Milk Tray last night and I’ve not shaved my legs for 2 weeks.  

What’s wrong with who I am now? Why do I have to be happier, healthier, slimmer (well maybe a little bit!) – the perfect mother, wife, lover. Am I not ok as I am?

In an attempt to find some sanity I sought out my favourite book of the moment “F**k it – the ultimate spiritual way” by John Parkin. He tells us to stop struggling and do what we fancy and suggests that saying f**k It is the perfect Western expression of the Eastern spiritual ideas, of letting go, giving up and finding real freedom by realising that things don’t matter so much (if at all). "Stop clinging to how you want things to be and try letting go - of your ideas, beliefs and expectations. Accept life for what it is," says John "accept life in all its wonderful, stressful, lonely, awful, delightful ways. The truth is there's not a lot you can do about most of it."

So will you join me in the fight back?  Will you join me in saying “Hey leave us alone we’re ok as we are thank you very much. We know we might need to lose a bit of weight, have days when we bounce out of bed with vim and vigour and days when the couch is firmly stuck to our bums, days when we cry like babies and days when we laugh like hyenas, but SO WHAT – we’re human and we’re lovely and we accept ourselves just as we are, warts and all and its OK. “

Custard cream anyone?