What are you expecting to receive from your loved one this Valentine Day? A dozen beautiful red roses? A card and a box of chocs?  Or will it be the dreaded bunch of wilted petrol station carnations?

Valentine’s Day fever has exploded in recent years. The Greeting Cards Association estimate that over 1 billion cards are sent to celebrate this day of love. With this, our expectations are higher than ever to exchange momentous expressions of love between our significant others. The only problem with this is the danger that our feelings of happiness and self worth get mixed up in the frenzy of the Valentine’s Day hype. And that we use external trappings to reinforce feelings about ourselves. For example; A dozen red roses –I must be beautiful,  Chocs - I’m nearly there, maybe if I try a bit harder......, Carnations - There must be something wrong with me.......

Everything you attract into your life is a reflection of what you feel you deserve, what you feel you are worth and how highly you value yourself. So if you think you’re a waste of time you can pretty much guarantee others will think that too. We are all born with high self worth, yet somehow along the path of life our stocks get severely depleted. When this happens, because we need to feel good about ourselves, we begin to look outside ourselves for reinforcement and expect others to give it to us. The problem is, true self worth can only be self generated and as the world we live in these days offers little certainty or security it’s more vital than ever to find safety from within.

So whether you receive roses, chocs or wilting carnations this Valentine’s Day ask yourself the following questions;

1.       On a scale of 0 to 10 how do I rate my self worth at the moment?

2.       If my rate is less than 10, the three reasons why this is so are....

3.       What stops me from liking and loving myself more?

4.       How would my life be different if I believed in myself more?

5.       Five things that make me unique are....

6.       Three things that I wouldn’t want to change about me are....

7.       The main reason I’m glad I’m me is....

Don’t worry if finding some of the answers a bit of a challenge. You’re beginning a new way of thinking – the liking and loving yourself sort of thinking. Keep practising and soon it will become automatic and feel very natural. Caring about wilting carnations will become a thing of the past!

Happy Valentine’s Day!